Did you know that if you line your yoga map up with the crack between the mirrors that you will look at least 50 lbs skinnier?! I know it now! Never in my life have I felt so skinny! Helllloooo gorgeous!! Where the hell did you come from?
**WHISTLE WHISTLE**
The only downside...it's only half your body that gets skinny. My left side looked like Cindy Crawford, my right...Rosie O'Donnell. Whatever, ya win some, ya lose some.
I spend half the class trying to position myself just right. It was a treat to see my former self. The two-kids-ago body. The one I'll never see again!! And, no it's not a pity party...this is ACCEPTANCE! My hips shifted during both pregnancies (if that's really possible I don't know?!) but they did...my hip bones moved out at least two inches on each side. But that doesn't mean that I don't miss them from time to time. My awesome 16yr old hips. I'd also take my 16 yr old boobs for a test drive or two also, especially now that I would actually appreciate them!
..........I interrupt this blog to say that I'm watching the last Oprah show as I try to type this, and tears are streaming down my face. Its like I just lost my black mother......and I'm pretty sure if Oprah was my mama she would have taught me how to use bleach!...........
OK, phew...wipe those tears away!! Like my hips, I must also accept that Oprah will not be a daily part of my life. Sad. Although the last few years of her show have sometimes been a little too preachy for me. But I just love her 'aha' moments, lord knows she given me quite a few.
What?! Yeah, back to my skinny ass in the mirror. Best part of my day! Now I'm thinking I should go buy two wall mirrors from Walmart and put them side by side so I can experience it every morning before I get dressed. I could move from left side to right side, back and forth, and then do it all over again! But then I remembered that we broke up with Walmart. Really though, I made the kids breakup with Walmart, I didn't really mean me...
I definitely think I'll give up my fight for the corner in the back and make my permanent move to the crack!
No comments:
Post a Comment