Worst Mom EVER!!!!

I have a twelve year old son.  'Nuff said...

There's a rule in this house....get caught lying and the punishment is automatically worse.   So tell the truth to make it easier on all of us.

Sometimes Jer can be so honest its annoying.  Like when he was five and we used to say "You have to go to bed when Caillou is over"....and he'd come running to let us know it was done.  We'd say "ok, bedtime" and he'd wail and scream like we somehow wrecked his night.  He's very literal and follows the rules...until they do not suite him anymore.

This is a daily thing with my son...rules are rules for a reason. Don't say black if you really mean gray.  Don't say supper will be ready at 6pm if you really mean between 6-6:30pm.  OHH, NO!  Do NOT say anything you are not prepared to follow through on to a tee.  I have to s.p.e.l.l. it out for him most of the time.  So, for example, when I say you're grounded I have to say...that means no xbox, no friends in the house, no going outside to play, fine you can watch TV but we get 1st dibs on any shows and you have no say, and so on and so forth.

We had a bonfire over the weekend since the kids each had a friend over.  We were in the backyard, TRYING to have a good time but Jer decided to push all buttons available.  Eventually, I called it quits and sent him in the house while we packed up.  I came to the front of the house and Grace was holding pieces of wood and metal in her hand while the front door was wide open. Huh?!  I asked what happened and she said she didn't know, the door just "broke".  What?  So I look and sure enough the frame of the door has splintered.  Like wood splinters everywhere, the plate that the lock penetrated (Tee hee!!) was blown off, screws on the floor, the trim was off the wall.  WHAT?!?!  It was like the door exploded.  Well first thought ..."JEREMY!!!!!!!!" .....WTH did you do to the door?!?  WELL....apparently the worst mommy move EVER because I didn't ASK him if he did it first.  According to him I should have asked very politely "Jeremy, did you, by chance, happen to do something to the door...I'M NOT BLAMING, just asking"....so he could come back in return with "No mother, I did not".  Turns out my "WTH JEREMY!!!" was bad parenting according to him! LOL ....ooops! Sorry! 

I tried to explain that based on the situation, my first reaction was that it was likely him. He'd just been sent in the house, he was pissed off, he was the last one to touch the door, and he has a habit of slamming things.  But I "never let him explain"...so he never had the chance to tell me it was Grace.  Now, of course, my sweet little munchkin does NOTHING wrong so I still didn't believe him.  That made things 10 times worse!  Now he's yelling, I'm yelling, and we are getting nowhere! Turns out it was Grace....oops.  Do I backpedal?  Do I apologize? I dunno, move on....

Monday...I get a call from Jeremy's teacher. He was sent to the office because of his attitude.  Blah, blah, blah...I didn't really listen, but I think that's the point of what she was talking about.  (I joke!!) Anyway, I get home and ask how his day went..."GOOD"...hmmm, really?! Let me give this another try..."anything happen today"..."nope, not much, just the usual"...hmm....now I'm annoyed.  In my best Judge Judy voice...don't pee on my leg and tell me its raining!!

So I just spill the beans..."I know you got in trouble today"......FLOODGATES OPENED...apparently the teachers misunderstood and he wasn't being rude.  TWO teachers, not just one, but I can't mention that because I always blame him for EVERYTHING! A lot of WHATEVERs and eye rolls later, I find myself explaining to him that if I walked in on a murder scene and found someone holding the gun that I would assume he was the killer.  REALLY!?  I don't even know where that came from but that's my example to my 12 year old!  I think he got my point enough because he sort of calmed down.  He even helped me make dinner.  All was good....

Until I mentioned those dreaded words...."oh, by the way, you are GROUNDED!!"..... 
But if I wasn't here to make his life miserable how boring would that be?!