Just Call Me Dusty Westchester...

I don't usually remember my dreams but when I do it's usually because they are extremely steamy or terrifying.

I once had a dream about a plane crash in my front yard, with bloody and screaming bodies everywhere.  I could even smell the burning flesh in my dream. Gross, I know.

Last night I had an inappropriate dream about a celebrity.  No, not Brad Pitt. Not even George Clooney.  I would have loved for it to have been Bill Clinton…seriously; I have a thing for older men.  (Daddy issues, whatever).  Nope…none of those guys.  I had a dream about Ian Ziering from Beverly Hills 90210.  What!? Seriously???  Couldn't have been Luke Perry?? Ian-Friggin-Ziering?  Yuck.  So not my type. 

I have no clue why.  I haven't seen him on TV. I don't even know if he counts as a celebrity anymore?  D-List at best.

Curiosity killed the cat, so I googled sex dreams with celebrities. Here's what I found:

To dream that you are having sex with a celebrity indicates your drive to be successful. You are striving for recognition. Consider what movies you associate this celebrity with for clues as to where and what you want to achieve success in.

Ok…let’s go with that.  Let me see what movies he's been in and how this could possibly apply to me?

Tyrannosaurus Azteca - Two years before his famous encounter with Montezuma, Cortes is sent on a scouting mission to shores south of Mexico where he and his band of Conquistadores discover a small tribe of Aztecs who sacrifice their own people to satisfy the hunger of the "Thunder Lizard" living in the jungle.

The Christmas Hope - When lives intertwine during Christmas, hope is the only unifying gift. After suffering a personal tragedy, a social worker throws herself into finding homes for children in need.

Lava Storm - Lori and John Wilson, employees of an emergency response center, must find a way to survive the initial lava storms, to save John's father and their two teenage children. Even more importantly, they must find a way to slow the path of the lava storms, to give humankind the time to find a solution to this natural disaster, in order to save humanity and our Earth.

Stripped Down - With two fellow strippers, Lily spirals into a world of money, sex, and violence, ultimately awakening to a new 'stripped down' reality.

And, of course, Beverly Hills 90210 - Focuses on the pleasures and problems of a group of rich children who go to West Beverly High School.

I have contemplated this for a few minutes and have finally figured out what I am supposed to do with my life!!
I’m going to move to Mexico to save lost children from their lava-filled villages, while wearing my stripper heels and driving my Lamborghini.  My stage name will be Dusty Westchester.

Sounds about right…