The shakes are frickin awesome!! Seriously. The shake mix smells like cake mix (delish!!), and you can mix it with anything so the options are limitless....like "Iced Cap" or "Creamcicle". AMAZEBALLS!!!
Seeing as I like to win, I've set my sights LOW....lose 15 pounds before Christmas. This should be easy-enough as I'm also doing a 30 day yoga challenge in November. That's only like _____lbs a week (I hate math, you figure it out). If I can't lose fifteen pounds by then...well forget it, hand me some ice cream, give me the remote, then shoot me in the face cause I will officially give up.
Poor planning on my part that the same day I decided to start my challenge was the same day as our Halloween Potluck at work. I knew I wouldn't exactly be off to a great start, but I figured a shake for breakfast, a shitty lunch, and then a shake for supper was better than a shitty breakfast and a shitty lunch, followed by a shitty-er supper. Plus I sort of behaved at the potluck....not really, but I only had one little tiny piece of cake, and left the rest of the desserts alone....except one cookie, but really, other than that I was good.
As part of the challenge, I have to weight myself (ughh), and take measurements...I'm gonna take a stab in the dark and just admit that it's likely not 36-24-36. I won't even lie either, this is going to be truthful, unlike my driver's license, work ID, or anything else that I either have to put weight (135lbs...ha!), height (5'8"...in my dreams), or my clothing size (XS of course). I used to be all of that...well except the height, no matter how hard I wished it. The whole "it's baby weight" excuse just doesn't fly anymore considering my youngest is nine!
We all know by now that the number on the scale really isn't what matters. You take into consideration your height, your BMI (shudder), your overall body structure. I was blessed to have my hips shoot out when I got pregnant. (Good for the birth, bad for the pants size)...so regardless of how much weight I ever lose I know I'll never be a size 5 again (sigh).
But regardless of what I know....it's still not easy. Some mornings I wake up and think...hmm, I'm not that bad, I have a belly and thick thighs, but I can still pull it off. Then other mornings I'm so disgusted with myself that I literally sit there, in front of the mirror and just mentally rip myself to shreds. Somedays I feel like I have a 'normal' body, somedays I feel like a beached whale. It doesn't take much to flip the switch, a random comment or trying on a pair of pants that don't quite fit. I get frustrated because I'm sort of in between sizes so it's hard to find clothes that fit. It's not like you can go into a store and just be the same size in everything. Oh, hell no....that would way tooooo complicated for designers to get their shit together and just go with one size.
All those skinny-bitch stores run small to make you feel like crap, and the fat-people stores run big to make you feel less fat. Either way...you still feel bad because the skinny bitches are all running around in the clothes you want, and the fat people are all wearing ugly clothes because apparently decent designers don't like fat people wearing their clothes.
Reitmans...ever take a look at the clothes in the skinny-bitches section and then go look at the plus-size section??? NONE of the clothes are the same. Why can't they make the same stuff just bigger?? That's not even a good example because Reitmans is pretty reasonable.
Smart Set, Ricki's, Garage.........they don't even make sizes to fit me. Like I'm a gigantic blob....those stores, right from the get-go tell me I'm too fat to shop there. It's not like I'm obese...I'm just overweight, and technically not even by that much. I can go to the mall, with like a gazillions stores, and my choices are old-lady, or Old Navy.
Then you see all those poor 'chunky' teenagers trying to stuff their asses in to pants too small, and shirts too tight....because "society" says "You MUST shop at THIS store to be cool". Muffin tops are every where!! I can only imagine how it feels to be an over weight teenager in a mean world of bullying. I was a skinny bitch in high school and I just pray that I never, ever, ever made anyone feel bad because of their sizes. I know I was a mean girl and said and did some bitchy things...but if I only knew what I know then...
I wish I had the power to start my own Occupization...lol, I don't think that's a word?! But I would occupy all skinny-bitch stores until they made normal, consistent sizes for all of us!!
For now, I will occupy my own self-esteem...no more hiding, no more lying, no more pretending. It's just time to lose some weight!! (And not just because society says so).
So begins Occupy Wendy:
The mission.....to no longer hide anything. Listed below you will find my ACTUAL weight, and measurements...no rounding-down.
The goal....to remove the stigma from all us "fat" girls...I'm not proud of what I weight, but I will no longer be ashamed.
26 Oct 11:
Height - 5'6
Weight - 187lbs
Chest - 36.5"
Waist - 38"
Hips - 46.5"
BMI: 30
WOW!!!! Wendy. Good for you! Maybe when I get a budget going I will try that too!!! I think it is great you are doing something for yourself. I am a proud momma!
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